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IDENTICAL!: The Distinct Attorney's Latest Clown Shows
PLUS: The Queen of the North Shore Puts Her Tits To Work at the Silly Council
It must not be fun to be the Distinct Attorney nowadays. He has a wife that can’t keep her mouth shut about her sordid misdeeds. He has Judge Magoo calling all the time to ensure his wife doesn’t get into the cross-hairs of the Distinct Attorney’s vanity prosecution. His recusal decisions all stink. When he recuses, his political allies become Special Prosecutors and rack up big bucks on the taxpayers’ dime. When he doesn’t recuse, it’s because he can’t do anything but give in to the Party Bosses and assorted scallywags, or else his and his wife’s political careers are all but over. And we’ve not even begun to talk about the longtime Nancy Pelosi-aligned Distinct Attorney’s problems with the Church over his public Pro-Baby Murder political stance.
But the past few days may have taken the cake for the biggest Clown Show. The Distinct Attorney has been reduced to laughable by an ages-old maxim of legal reasoning from the great legal scholar Vincent LaGuardia Gambini. This storied legal tool is the doctrine of IDENTICAL!
At least twice in the last few days, the Distinct Attorney has had face-palm moments à la Jean-Luc Picard and Homer Simpson. And they are all related to the Distinct Attorney and the First Family’s Vanity Case against Our Hero Luthmann, which may end up sapping Taxpayers of over $1 million by the time all is said and done.
The Distinct Attorney’s Vanity Case - Part 1
A few days ago, our friend Morrie received a Freedom of Information Law (FOIL) Appeal from Our Hero Luthmann, seeking financial records for the Special Schmuck’s five-plus year billing frenzy since the Distinct Attorney recused himself in Our Hero’s case. The Distinct Attorney’s Office had previously responded to Luthmann concerning the billing and expense records for the Special Schmuck. The Distinct Attorney’s Office said:
The problem with the Distinct Attorney’s response is that it is pure and unadulterated BULLSHIT. And we can prove this using Mr. Vincent LaGuardia Gambini’s technique. Here is a response to Luthmann’s previous FOIL request submitted to the NYS Comptroller seeking the same billing, expense, and payment records:
And here is a response to Luthmann’s previous FOIL request submitted to the NYC Comptroller, also seeking the same billing, expense, and payment records:
The Comptroller’s Office controls all of the money, and they know where the money is and where it went. Let’s put these two letters side-by-side, so we don’t miss anything:
So the guys who are in charge of the money gave responses that are IDENTICAL. The NYS and NYC Comptrollers both said to ask the Distinct Attorney about the records for the money. The Distinct Attorney knows where it is because we don’t. So what logical conclusion does the great Vincent LaGuardia Gambini derive from the facts in evidence:
Our friend Morrie in the Distinct Attorney’s Office is in a bit of a pickle. He has to deal with Luthmann’s FOIL Appeal, and it’s clear to a five-year-old that takes one whiff of the Distinct Attorney’s Office can detect that Bullshit is Everywhere. What will Morrie do? Will he ruin a reputation built over decades to carry the Distinct Attorney’s bullshit just to have it get laughed out of the Feudal Courts in a few weeks? The last time I checked, the Progressive NYC Comptroller wasn’t going to bat for the Distinct Attorney and the Ruling Elite who attack Progressive Law Enforcement Policies mercilessly to score political points. The First Family won’t be happy with the outcome here either way. Poor Morrie. Let’s hope that the Distinct Attorney and the Ruling Elite don’t get out their ice picks on this Morrie the same way they did to the other Morrie. Hopefully, no one calls Killary.
The Distinct Attorney’s Vanity Case - Part 2
So back in March, the Special Schmuck filed a motion with the Feudal Court seeking to extend an Order of Protection against Luthmann to cover the entire First Family. This request included the Distinct Attorney’s wife, a Feudal Court Judge who was previously the top judge but lost her job because of questionable activities involving warrant applications. You probably didn’t hear much about this story because the First Family had their personal Press Secretary working overtime to attack Luthmann and frame the First Family as the benevolent despots they are to so many in the Fourth Estate.
Last week, the Special Schmuck showed up in the Feudal Court to withdraw his motion. Magically, the Special Schmuck no longer wanted to expand the Order of Protection to cover the entire First Family. Maybe it had something to do with Luthmann’s subpoenas? Luthmann’s judge (about whom Luthmann has concerns is being improperly manipulated by the Distinct Attorney and the Ruling Elite) allowed the Special Schmuck to withdraw his motion and even said in a sidebar: “Luthmann’s issue on his appeal is in front of the Appellate Division, and he has an excellent case.” No one on the Isle of Staten expects Luthmann’s conviction to stick. To allow the Special Schmuck to save some face and justify his thousands upon thousands in billing to the Taxpayers, the Judge permitted the Special Schmuck to submit a brand new (facially invalid) Order of Protection for the Distinct Attorney against Luthmann:
The Special Schmuck has already billed the Taxpayers thousands of dollars since March, so let’s use the Vincent LaGuardia Gambini method to see what the Special Schmuck has achieved with all this time and money. Here is the original Order of Protection from October 2020:
Let’s put the relief side by side, so we don’t miss anything:
So under the Vincent LaGuardia Gambini method, these orders are not IDENTICAL. Before, the Special Schmuck tried to include all of the First Family. Now, the Distinct Attorney can’t even get an order through to protect his own Feudal Court Judge wife because the Distinct Attorney is too worried about what she might say when Luthmann comes to cross-examine her. It’s a sad day for the Distinct Attorney when he can’t go to court for his own wife.
The Distinct Attorney’s Vanity Case and the Silly Council
Luthmann’s Judge tried to sweep all of the issues surrounding the Special Schmuck’s fees, the Special Schmuck’s Disqualification, and the Court’s Recusal under the rug. The Judge reasoned that these issues were now before the Appellate Division. However, a pending appeal does not divest this court of jurisdiction on fundamental matters like Recusal and Disqualification. Stay tuned for more on this very soon from Luthmann.
Additionally, the issues surrounding the Special Schmuck’s billing, expense, and payment records are germane to the Silly Council because the Taxpayers will end up footing the entire bill for the Distinct Attorney’s Vanity Case. Luthmann let everyone in NYC Government know about how the Distinct Attorney operates and some of the questions that elected officials should ask the Distinct Attorney the next time he asks them for more money:
TITS AT WORK: The Queen of the North Shore’s Photo Op
Where is the Queen of the North Shore? That is a question that many are asking. Recently, Ghost Face Killah from the Wu-Tang Clan was joined by the Mayor, the Congresswoman, local dignitaries, and other officials to celebrate the opening of the Wu-Tang Clan member’s new coffee shop in the Queen of the North Shore’s District. But the Queen was nowhere to be found. Where was she? In her place, she sent one of her serfs dressed in sweats. Maybe she needs to buy her people some appropriate clothing.
The Queen of the North Shore isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. She’s no Queen of the North, and she isn’t playing chess. Heck, she’s barely playing a scratch-off ticket. If she had any brains advising her, they would have told her that she could serve in her seat for the rest of the decade, and more people in her District would still know who Ghost Face Killah was over her. And she could serve out the rest of her current two-year term, and a more than sizeable chunk of her District will still regard Debi Rose as the Once and Future Queen of the North Shore. Why our Former Republican Mayoral Candidate Curtis Sliwa-loving grifter doesn’t understand her vital need for Photo-Ops is anyone’s guess. It’s not like she needs to start giving press conferences at an eight-year-old’s birthday parties as some politicians would. But the Queen of the North Shore is somewhat lacking in presence in her District.
In what may become an encapsulation of her entire tenure in office, the Queen of the North Shore recently botched another Photo-Op - this time by being present. Hizzoner took to the press to present the budget deal, and our Queen had herself perfectly placed. She was just behind the podium, so everyone would see her while the historically-swollen budget reached by the Mayor and the Silly Council was announced. This would be the Queen’s time to shine. The only problem is that she didn’t make the paper.
Well, that’s not entirely accurate. The Queen’s tits were front and center in the newspaper coverage. This may become the story of the Queen’s life, or at least her political career. No one will remember her face.
Is there more? Of course, there is more. Luthmann is armed with many weapons in the Great Troll War.
But there will be many more Enemies to come. What new Enemies will show their faces in the Feudal Court and elsewhere? Which members of the Ruling Elite should be worried? What other persons may become collateral damage in this story? And what magical weapons does Luthmann have to slay his Enemies?
Stay tuned. Much more to come.
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